Anyways, I thought I would share some pictures of our time together...because I know you are all dying to see them ;)
Thursday, 22 March 2018
A visit from Nana and Papa
My Dad is waiting for a Kidney transplant this spring, and because of that, wont be able to travel much in the next few months. So while they wait, we had the privilege of them coming to us for a visit! We had such a great time with them! Our kids really love being surrounded by family. We don't get to see my parents as much as I would like, they live in BC so in order to see one another there is a lot of travelling required. So it's always a treat when we get to spend time together. Watching my kids interact with them really reminds me of my childhood. All of my grandparents live in Northern Ireland, so we only ever saw them if we went on holidays to see them or if they came to us. Although I would of really liked to grow up with them living close, having them far away made our visits so much sweeter. Your time together becomes a lot more intentional, and I love that. Plus, our kids get just as spoiled as I did by my grandparents! It's fun to relive it but from a different perspective. There was a lot of coffee shop visits, eating at chicken chef (your welcome, Dad), going for walks, wrestling, swimming, and shopping. It's always hard to say goodbye, but, Lord willing we will heading their way in a few weeks to be with my parents as my Dad undergoes the kidney transplant. We would appreciate prayer for that, and for the donors family. What a gift they are giving our family! Next up: a visit from my Brother and Sister in law!
Anyways, I thought I would share some pictures of our time together...because I know you are all dying to see them ;)
Anyways, I thought I would share some pictures of our time together...because I know you are all dying to see them ;)
Wednesday, 10 January 2018
A New Years Resolution
Is it to late into January to talk about resolutions? How many people have given up on their new year resolutions already? Still going strong? It feels a little awkward to be brining up the topic of resolutions a week into January. It's been the longest week; January 1st feels so long ago. Does anyone else feel that way?
I've entered into 2018 with a heavy heart. Not only for the burdens I've seen around me, the suffering, the hurt, the pain, but also for the unknown. 2018 just seems to have a giant BLANK below it. What will this year hold? I HAVE NO IDEA and that terrifies me. The unknown has always been daunting to me. It's a place of fear, worry and anxiety. A place where there is no peace. A place that often cripples me at just the thought of it. And as I thought about the new year approaching and what it would look like, what it would hold, I panicked. I didn't know. I didn't know what trials we would face, what paths we would have to walk, what mountains we would have to climb. Would this year be really hard? Would it be stretching, or would it be easy? I didn't have any answers then and I still don't now. I'm a planner, like big time. Give me all the calendars, planners and schedules. I like to be able to look at the next day, or month, and see exactly what kind of things we have on our plates and the beginning of a New Year is just a big empty canvas with no plan. Enter Rebekah's panic stricken face.
But, as I thought about these things and prayed for peace I was reminded of a quote I heard this past year by Elizabeth Elliot: "Do the next thing." Simple, right? But I don't think I've ever really given it that much thought. Don't look at the daunting year ahead with all its uncertainties and unknowns, just do the next thing. Start at the beginning, and then do what's next. For me, that's as simple as doing the laundry, or brushing my teeth, or feeding my kids lunch.
I want this year to be about living. Not just living for the sake of living, but living with the right perspective. Because heaven knows my perspective is often so wrong. Living with a perspective that's focused on the bigger picture: eternity. This world and all it has to offer sucks me in way more than I'd like to admit. It's comfortable, it's enticing, and often it's what I'm focused on. I think that's what my fear of the unknown really comes down to: my worldly perspective. When eternity is what is in the forefront of my mind, everything else changes. I don't need to be worried about tomorrow, this month or even next year- because I know who is in control of it. Today is a gift, a wonderful, precious gift, and right now is all that's guaranteed to me. Is that sentence not terrifying to you? I find it terrifying, but I shouldn't. This life isn't guaranteed to me, this year isn't, but eternity is because of salvation in Christ Jesus...and that should be comforting. I need to set my mind on things above, not on earthly things.
So here's my new year resolution: to live. Live with an eternal perspective, with my heart and mind fixed on things above. To live each day first, instead of worrying about the things of tomorrow. To live each day as it is, a gift. To love the world less and my saviour more. I don't know what will all be in store for us this upcoming year, but I know who has gone before me, who's grace is sufficient for every moment, and that He works all things together for the good of those who love him. "You see how your neediness points you to Christ's sufficiency" -Gloria Furman. In Him and the power of the gospel I can enter 2018 with a peace that surpasses all understanding. I can have confidence in what eternity holds for me, even if I don't have confidence in what this year holds.
I've entered into 2018 with a heavy heart. Not only for the burdens I've seen around me, the suffering, the hurt, the pain, but also for the unknown. 2018 just seems to have a giant BLANK below it. What will this year hold? I HAVE NO IDEA and that terrifies me. The unknown has always been daunting to me. It's a place of fear, worry and anxiety. A place where there is no peace. A place that often cripples me at just the thought of it. And as I thought about the new year approaching and what it would look like, what it would hold, I panicked. I didn't know. I didn't know what trials we would face, what paths we would have to walk, what mountains we would have to climb. Would this year be really hard? Would it be stretching, or would it be easy? I didn't have any answers then and I still don't now. I'm a planner, like big time. Give me all the calendars, planners and schedules. I like to be able to look at the next day, or month, and see exactly what kind of things we have on our plates and the beginning of a New Year is just a big empty canvas with no plan. Enter Rebekah's panic stricken face.
But, as I thought about these things and prayed for peace I was reminded of a quote I heard this past year by Elizabeth Elliot: "Do the next thing." Simple, right? But I don't think I've ever really given it that much thought. Don't look at the daunting year ahead with all its uncertainties and unknowns, just do the next thing. Start at the beginning, and then do what's next. For me, that's as simple as doing the laundry, or brushing my teeth, or feeding my kids lunch.
I want this year to be about living. Not just living for the sake of living, but living with the right perspective. Because heaven knows my perspective is often so wrong. Living with a perspective that's focused on the bigger picture: eternity. This world and all it has to offer sucks me in way more than I'd like to admit. It's comfortable, it's enticing, and often it's what I'm focused on. I think that's what my fear of the unknown really comes down to: my worldly perspective. When eternity is what is in the forefront of my mind, everything else changes. I don't need to be worried about tomorrow, this month or even next year- because I know who is in control of it. Today is a gift, a wonderful, precious gift, and right now is all that's guaranteed to me. Is that sentence not terrifying to you? I find it terrifying, but I shouldn't. This life isn't guaranteed to me, this year isn't, but eternity is because of salvation in Christ Jesus...and that should be comforting. I need to set my mind on things above, not on earthly things.
So here's my new year resolution: to live. Live with an eternal perspective, with my heart and mind fixed on things above. To live each day first, instead of worrying about the things of tomorrow. To live each day as it is, a gift. To love the world less and my saviour more. I don't know what will all be in store for us this upcoming year, but I know who has gone before me, who's grace is sufficient for every moment, and that He works all things together for the good of those who love him. "You see how your neediness points you to Christ's sufficiency" -Gloria Furman. In Him and the power of the gospel I can enter 2018 with a peace that surpasses all understanding. I can have confidence in what eternity holds for me, even if I don't have confidence in what this year holds.
"But our citizenship is in heaven, and from it we await a saviour, the Lord Jesus Christ. Who will transform our lowly body to be like his glorious body, by the power that enables him even to subject all things to himself." Philippians 3:20 and 21
"Let what you heard from the beginning abide in you. If what you heard from the beginning abides in you, then you too will abide in the Son and in the Father. And this is the promise that he made to us- eternal life." 1 John 1:24 and 25
"Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the father is not in him. For all that is in the world- the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride in possessions- is not from the Father but from the world. And the world is passing away along with its desires, but whoever does the will of God abides forever." 1 John 2:15-17
"You and I stand on the porch of eternity. Both of us will soon stand before God to give an account for our stewardship of the time, resources, the gifts, and ultimately the gospel he has entrusted to us. When that day comes, I am convinced we will not wish we had given more of ourselves to live the American dream." -David Platt
Monday, 1 January 2018
2017 Best
2017 was such a great year. Don't get me wrong, it had its low lows, and its high highs, but those things are what made this year so good. God is so faithful, and although this year was hard in many ways his grace was and is sufficient. Im so thankful for this journey that were on and for the people I get to do life with. I've really been enjoying the memories that are captured in pictures, it's been so fun to look back on all the pictures that were taken this year and re live the moments that they remind us of. Pictures really do say 1,000 words, and more. It's been so fun, and challenging, to get out of my comfort zone and really do something that I enjoy. Thank you so much to those people who let me capture moments for them this year, I loved every minute of it. Here are a few of favourites from this past year:
Monday, 18 July 2016
Now that our precious little girl is a month old I thought I would share why we chose to name her what we did. Naming our children has always been a task that's very important to me. I really like it when their names have meaning, when it comes with a story. Both our children's names come from the Bible, and they're names that I've loved for a very long time. They're names that point to God and his goodness. Keziah is a name that I've loved ever since I was a teenager. It comes from the book of Job. The book of Job is about a righteous man who loves God and desires to live a life that shows that. Through a series of circumstances his faith was tested, losing his family, his wealth and his health. Though it wasn't always easy he stood firm in his beliefs and had faith that even if these difficult things wouldn't end, God was still good. In the end God ended up blessing Job ten fold. He blessed him with restoring his health, blessing him with way more livestock and land than he had before and with a family again. One of Job's new daughters is named Keziah. I've always really loved that story and the truth that it shares.
This time last year I was walking through a very difficult valley. Like many of you know we lost a child to miscarriage at the beginning of June, 2015. Though scary, my desire to grow our family never stopped and I longed to carry another child. Many days I prayed that if it was God's will he would bless us with another child. A lot of months went by to no avail, and I was discouraged. I was reminded that even if God chose not to give us another child, he was still good and he was still worth serving. That fall of 2015 we found out we were expecting again! Those first few weeks were spent in a lot of fear, fearing that we would loose this child too. Fearing that I would have to walk that path again, a path I didn't feel like I could face. One morning I was writing in my journal about all these fears and worries when all of a sudden it dawned on me: in June of 2015 we lost a baby and in June of 2016 we were expecting another. In that moment I felt God wrap his around me and tell me that he cared about me, he cared about that life that we lost and he cares about the new life that was growing inside of me. He reminded me of his goodness, even though he didn't have too. It was in that moment that I knew if we were to have a girl, her name would be Keziah Ruth. It was in that moment that I saw God taking something broken and difficult and making it beautiful. It was in that moment that I was reminded of God's redeeming power and love. God was giving us a gift, a very precious gift. Out of a dark valley came something good. Just like in the book of Job.
The name Ruth is also very special to me. In the spring of 2013 my family lost someone very special after a battle with cancer. My aunty Ruth went home to be with her Saviour. She was someone that I loved dearly and looked up too. Some of my fondest childhood memories involve her and my Uncle. She was a beautiful, Godly women with a gentle and quiet spirit. Someone that I would love my daughter to take after. But the name Ruth is special for another reason, once again it comes from the Bible. In the book of Ruth we see a story of God's providence, and a story of redemption. We've already seen God's providence so many times in her little life. It was by no mistake that she was brought into this world, she's here for a very real purpose, and I believe that with all my heart. I'm so excited to see that purpose unravel as I watch her grow up, Lord willing.
She is a gift. A gift i'm thankful for every day. Both my children are. What a treasure it is to be entrusted with these little lives, to mold and shape them into who they will become.
A month old already, and what an eventful month that has been! She weighs 8.15 lbs now, and is still 22.5 inches long. She loves to eat, gives the best little grins, sleeps through the night and has completely stolen our hearts. I hope and pray for many, many more months and years with you little girl!
Wednesday, 29 June 2016
When God says "No"
It's funny really how often we (okay, maybe just I) think that we're in control of the future. We spend so much time planning and thinking about how things are going to play out. This and that is going to happen at this specific time and it's going to happen this way. That's how I spent the last two months of pregnancy. I was certain that this baby was going to come early. I was certain that my water would break at home and I would know for sure that it was "time". Well, surprise, surprise, it didn't go as I had planned. It never really does, and in the end I'm always thankful for that.
Four days past my due date, the contractions started. At least I was pretty sure they were contractions, I was never really sure. From 2:30 am I was wide awake, and wondering if this could be the day we finally got to meet our precious daughter! Finally around 10:30am we decided that it was probably wise to go to the hospital just to get checked out and make sure everything was going okay. I was fairly disappointed, because you know my water hadn't broken yet like it was supposed too. This baby obviously wasn't agreeing with my plan and how I thought things were supposed progress. After a hour long drive to the hospital we finally got to the maternity ward where we were placed in an observation room and hooked up to machines. Babies heart beat was doing wonderfully, but contractions were kind of all over the place. After three hours of lying in that room we were finally admitted. That place was buzzing. Women left, right, and centre were giving birth! Nurses were running all over the place, delivery carts were being sent down the hallway and babies were crying. Our room however, was calm. Not much was happening, other than the hunger pains in my husbands stomach. Different nurses were coming and going into our room as everyone was being shuffled around. For a moment it felt like time was standing still for us. So we walked, and walked and walked. Still, not very much progression and still no water breaking. After about five hours I finally caved and asked for an epidural. The talk around "town" was that this was probably my last chance for the night. I wasn't about to pass up an opportunity to finally feel a little bit comfortable, as far as I was concerned, we were going to be here for a while. Trying to stay still for that procedure as I breathed through contractions was probably one of the hardest things i've ever had to do up until that moment. I'm fairly certain the anesthesioligst was very annoyed with me. "Ma'am, you have to stay still." he said over and over again. I was trying, I really, really was. Finally, it was over. I was checked a few more times during the evening and still nothing had really moved forward. Things had started to calm down a little on the rest of the ward, and it began to get dark outside. Our room was quiet as my husband grabbed some shut eye. The decision was finally made that I should probably go on oxytocin to make the contractions a little stronger. Babies head wasn't moving, and my water still hand't broken. After about 9 hours of being in the hospital we finally saw a doctor. She checked to see how far along I was, and in the process got a little concerned that the head still wasn't where it needed to be. Something was possibly in the way, or we just couldn't feel the head yet because my water still hadn't broken. She didn't want to break my waters, but accidentally did. And at the point everything changed so quickly. "It's the cord" she said with a terrified look on her face. All of sudden the room was filled with more nurses than I could count, talk of making sure babies heart rate wasn't dropping was being voiced. The doctor kept her hand on the cord as she sat at the end of my bed and assured me that everything was going to be ok, but they needed to do an emergeny c-section, as soon as possible. Fear filled my heart as Michael made his way to the side of my bed and held my hand. Babies heart beat would drop every once in a while and the doctor told the nurses that they needed to let the NICU know so they could be prepared. Before I knew it Michael was being passed scrubs and I was being whisked down the hallway on the bed. The pain was unbearable, and the fear was overwhelming. When we got to the OR the quick decision was made that I needed to be put under and they needed to get that baby out as soon as possible. Michael was no longer allowed to be present, he kissed me, told me he loved me and that he was praying then he disappeared. I had to do this without him, and that scared me. I got moved to the operating table, and then all of a sudden the doctor told me she had managed to move the cord back over babies head, and that I needed to start pushing. Wait? I thought I was getting a c-section? Nope, not anymore! I started pushing and within three minutes our beautiful girl was placed on my chest. I cried. That was the most emotional and terrifying ten minutes I've ever experienced. Within minutes Michael was back down in the OR, fully expecting to be an encouragement to me as I pushed. But no, she was here already! Keziah Ruth, 8.10 lbs and 22.5 inches long.
I had prayed and prayed and prayed during my whole pregnancy that my water would break at home. When it never did, I was actually very bitter towards God. Why wasn't he hearing me? Why wasn't he answering? He was answering me, he was saying no. The next morning the doctor came to see how we were doing and affectionally nicknamed our little girl "trouble". She told us that if she hadn't been there when my water broke, we would of lost Keziah. The pressure put on the cord would of caused her little body stress and would of caused her heart rate to drop drastically. It all happened exactly how it was supposed to. God knew that. His providence was already so evident in her little life. He said no to something I wanted so terribly because he saw the whole picture, I didn't. She's here, healthy, happy and two weeks old! Her birth is definitely something i'm not going to quickly forget about. It's a story i'm going to tell her again and again. It's a story that points to Gods goodness and care for his children. It's a story that proves that when God says no, it's for our good.
Four days past my due date, the contractions started. At least I was pretty sure they were contractions, I was never really sure. From 2:30 am I was wide awake, and wondering if this could be the day we finally got to meet our precious daughter! Finally around 10:30am we decided that it was probably wise to go to the hospital just to get checked out and make sure everything was going okay. I was fairly disappointed, because you know my water hadn't broken yet like it was supposed too. This baby obviously wasn't agreeing with my plan and how I thought things were supposed progress. After a hour long drive to the hospital we finally got to the maternity ward where we were placed in an observation room and hooked up to machines. Babies heart beat was doing wonderfully, but contractions were kind of all over the place. After three hours of lying in that room we were finally admitted. That place was buzzing. Women left, right, and centre were giving birth! Nurses were running all over the place, delivery carts were being sent down the hallway and babies were crying. Our room however, was calm. Not much was happening, other than the hunger pains in my husbands stomach. Different nurses were coming and going into our room as everyone was being shuffled around. For a moment it felt like time was standing still for us. So we walked, and walked and walked. Still, not very much progression and still no water breaking. After about five hours I finally caved and asked for an epidural. The talk around "town" was that this was probably my last chance for the night. I wasn't about to pass up an opportunity to finally feel a little bit comfortable, as far as I was concerned, we were going to be here for a while. Trying to stay still for that procedure as I breathed through contractions was probably one of the hardest things i've ever had to do up until that moment. I'm fairly certain the anesthesioligst was very annoyed with me. "Ma'am, you have to stay still." he said over and over again. I was trying, I really, really was. Finally, it was over. I was checked a few more times during the evening and still nothing had really moved forward. Things had started to calm down a little on the rest of the ward, and it began to get dark outside. Our room was quiet as my husband grabbed some shut eye. The decision was finally made that I should probably go on oxytocin to make the contractions a little stronger. Babies head wasn't moving, and my water still hand't broken. After about 9 hours of being in the hospital we finally saw a doctor. She checked to see how far along I was, and in the process got a little concerned that the head still wasn't where it needed to be. Something was possibly in the way, or we just couldn't feel the head yet because my water still hadn't broken. She didn't want to break my waters, but accidentally did. And at the point everything changed so quickly. "It's the cord" she said with a terrified look on her face. All of sudden the room was filled with more nurses than I could count, talk of making sure babies heart rate wasn't dropping was being voiced. The doctor kept her hand on the cord as she sat at the end of my bed and assured me that everything was going to be ok, but they needed to do an emergeny c-section, as soon as possible. Fear filled my heart as Michael made his way to the side of my bed and held my hand. Babies heart beat would drop every once in a while and the doctor told the nurses that they needed to let the NICU know so they could be prepared. Before I knew it Michael was being passed scrubs and I was being whisked down the hallway on the bed. The pain was unbearable, and the fear was overwhelming. When we got to the OR the quick decision was made that I needed to be put under and they needed to get that baby out as soon as possible. Michael was no longer allowed to be present, he kissed me, told me he loved me and that he was praying then he disappeared. I had to do this without him, and that scared me. I got moved to the operating table, and then all of a sudden the doctor told me she had managed to move the cord back over babies head, and that I needed to start pushing. Wait? I thought I was getting a c-section? Nope, not anymore! I started pushing and within three minutes our beautiful girl was placed on my chest. I cried. That was the most emotional and terrifying ten minutes I've ever experienced. Within minutes Michael was back down in the OR, fully expecting to be an encouragement to me as I pushed. But no, she was here already! Keziah Ruth, 8.10 lbs and 22.5 inches long.
I had prayed and prayed and prayed during my whole pregnancy that my water would break at home. When it never did, I was actually very bitter towards God. Why wasn't he hearing me? Why wasn't he answering? He was answering me, he was saying no. The next morning the doctor came to see how we were doing and affectionally nicknamed our little girl "trouble". She told us that if she hadn't been there when my water broke, we would of lost Keziah. The pressure put on the cord would of caused her little body stress and would of caused her heart rate to drop drastically. It all happened exactly how it was supposed to. God knew that. His providence was already so evident in her little life. He said no to something I wanted so terribly because he saw the whole picture, I didn't. She's here, healthy, happy and two weeks old! Her birth is definitely something i'm not going to quickly forget about. It's a story i'm going to tell her again and again. It's a story that points to Gods goodness and care for his children. It's a story that proves that when God says no, it's for our good.
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