Supportive Spouse

For us, summer is in full swing! Which means camp has started and we are busy. This year however, looks a lot different from last. As most of you know this past January Michael quit his job building houses and joined me full time at camp as their new program coordinator. Just a week ago I finished working at camp and am now on maternity leave (if all the paper work goes through :) ) so instead of me being full time at camp and Michael supporting me from a distance, he is the one working full time and I am learning what it means to be a supportive spouse. Specifically a wife supporting her husband in ministry. First of all, I don't want to separate  Michael's ministry and my ministry, I believe that we do this as a team whether one of us in the front lines and the other behind the scenes. This is our ministry, and we must do it together. But over that past few days I've really been pondering what this whole "doing it together" thing really looks like. Michael works hard, and in my personal opinion (I'm biased, I know) is doing an amazing job! And I sometimes feel like there isn't much for me to do but hang out at home and get ready for this baby! (Because even in the midst of busyness, there will still be a child added to our family at the end of the summer!!) But I realize more and more that I do play a vital role in Michael's role at camp. Not that he couldn't do it without me, because there's no doubt in my mind that he could- but we're a team now and God has designed us to work together and for each other.

The first thing that i've learned in what it means to be a supportive spouse is to pray for my husband. Before Michael was in full time ministry, I did pray for him- but not enough. I realized that I can't be everything he needs, and that I can't help in all situations even though I would like to. He needs his Saviour first and foremost, and I need to pray that his God would give him daily what he needs for the work that is set before him. I don't think I've prayed for my husband this much throughout our entire relationship- regretfully. But if I'm going to support my husband, what better way to do that than surrender him to the one who made him and knows him so much better than I do? I may think I know what he needs, but in comparison to his heavenly father, I know nothing.

Another thing I've learned is to love him (or strive to love him) the way that Christ has and does, and that is sacrificially as a servant. This one is hard. I'm a selfish person, and I really do like getting things my way. And to be honest it would be really easy to make these next few months about me, and about the baby that we are about to bring into this world. But it's not, not even close. This summer, this next year and our whole lives need to be about the ministry that God is calling us to, and for each and everyone of us that's bringing the good news of the Gospel to a world that desperately needs it. If i'm not careful I can make my husband feel guilty for doing the work he is doing instead of spending time with me. I need to guard my heart from those feelings, because I know without a doubt they will come to the surface every once  in a while. I need to serve my husband the way that Christ would, and sacrifice even the good things sometimes, like quality time spent with my husband. So how do I serve? I don't know yet, and I know I wont fully grasp it on this side of eternity; but I think it starts with being sensitive to what he needs. Does he need to come home to a clean house that's stress free? Sometimes yes! Does he need me to fill in for him during the day for certain things, sometimes yes! Does he need me to bring him something to drink from home, or a sweater, or his keys- sometimes yes! Does he need me to just be there so that he knows I'm around and supporting him? Almost always- yes. Does he need me to hug and kiss him every once in a while so he knows that I love him? Probably not as much as I need it, but sometimes yes. There are a million ways to serve- and I think I'm barely just scratching the surface.

Ministry is hard. Full time ministry is hard. Work place ministry is hard. We need each other. God has given us relationships for a reason, we can't do it alone and were not supposed too. As a wife I was created to be a help mate for my husband, it's biblical, and frankly I wouldn't have it any other way.